Couples often seek therapy when they are experiencing an impasse or when one or the other person feels there are serious inequities in the relationship that are not being resolved.  Such problems can arise early in a relationship, in the middle of a partnership or after years of being together.  Impasses may result from work stress, infidelity, life transitions, poor communication habits, or incompatibility. Partners may cope by withdrawing and burying their feelings, growing resentful, while others may find they are more irritable, fault-finding and argumentative.  In either case, partners may begin to experience distance, estrangement and a loss of intimacy.

Couple’s therapy is different from individual therapy because in couple’s therapy, the relationship is the focus of attention, whereas in individual therapy, the focus of attention is on the individual and her/his problems. Couple’s therapy focuses on the conflicts and problems that exist between two people. Alisa helps couples to identify the source of the conflict and provide guidance in determining what changes need to be made both within each person and between each partner.

Couple’s therapy involves helping couples to communicate more effectively and listen more deeply to one another. Alisa supports couples in cultivating greater attunement, compassion, and understanding toward themselves and each other. She works with couples to candidly clarify feelings and intentions and mediates disagreements with gentle discernment. Having a skillful therapist present can support each member of the couple in being heard and can deepen each person’s capacity to understand their mate from a place of non-judgment and empathy. The goal is to support couples in learning how to communicate thoughtfully and collaboratively, to develop mutually beneficial goals, and work cooperatively instead of competitively with one another.